Coming to off-Broadway

I rarely like to comment directly on the news of the day but occasionally a headline grabs me and fires up ye olde creative kindling:

LIL' KIM CHARGED IN NEW YORK SHOOTING PROBE

This news is of course very tragic for Ms. Kim, her family, and just possibly, all Orientals. But tragedy is the stuff of which great art is made. After all, would audiences have flocked to a movie in which the Titanic docked, or the Elephant Man merely had a bad case of backne? I doubt it.

In any case, this story, along with the spirit of Topol, has inspired me to once again dabble in the musical and theatrical arts. With a nod in the direction of a classic, I have composed the initial verse and chorus to a song that I hope will be the foundation for my next, true-to-life, off-Broadway play. Enjoy, and tell me what you think:

(Prosecutor)
Is this the Lil' Kim I questioned?
Why won't the Lil' Kim give us play?

(Lil' Kim)
I don't remember someone shooting
When did they?

(Prosecutor)
Kim, do you realize you're under oath here?
Perjury is a very serious charge

(Lil' Kim)
Bitch, don't you know I'm very busy?
Liv-in' large

(Reporters)
Lil' Kim indicted
Lil' Kim indicted
Oh yes, so sad
For all those who enjoyed how scan-tily
She was clad